For many years I felt if I do what is supposed to be done right then everything will go fine and if I read my Bible , pray and worship the lord is happy and everything is okay . I know there nothing like the love of lord . But when I do something that I feel super shame in the eyes of God I feel that the lord will never forgive me and feel everything that happens around me is my fault and I began to doubt his love and his presence. Like everything good I do is for nothing. I do want to live like that . I want to the know and dive the ture unconditional love and mercy. I not talking about the love I get from my husband or family the the lord. I want my anxiety be under control and stop doubting that his timing is perfect m
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